


in the dark

by thunderylee



Category: KAT-TUN (Band), NewS (Band)
Genre: Canon Universe, Frottage, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-19
Updated: 2011-09-19
Packaged: 2019-01-27 11:10:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12580464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thunderylee/pseuds/thunderylee
Summary: It’s easier to be honest when no one can see you.





	in the dark

**Author's Note:**

> reposted from agck.

Every little noise is amplified exponentially when the lights go out. Maybe there’s some kind of physics connection between sight and sound, but Yamapi was never good at physics and he has more important things to think about right now. Namely where the goddamn fuse box is.

And he’s not alone, of course he’s not. The power couldn’t have gone out any other night of the year when he was here by himself, possibly already asleep and oblivious to the whole situation. His phone is charged; his alarm would have woken him up. He has extra blankets to offset the cold autumn night.

“Wow, it looks like the whole street is out,” Jin observes, hanging out the front door while Yamapi pokes at the fuse box. “Must have been a blown transformer or something.”

Yamapi grunts like he knows what that is. It’s obviously not the fuses if the whole street doesn’t have power, so reluctantly he trudges up the front steps and follows Jin back into the house. Jin’s using his phone to guide his way and Yamapi just shakes his head.

“You’re going to waste the battery down if you keep doing that,” he tells him.

“There’s nothing else to do,” Jin replies, sounding bored, then his face lights up in the illumination from his phone. “Let’s go out!”

A loud clap of thunder answers him, followed by a bright streak of lightning, and both Jin and Yamapi stand in the doorway and watch as the sky opens up, releasing a downpour over their dark neighborhood.

“I should have candles,” Yamapi says slowly. “Somewhere.”

They find incense, which isn’t nearly as effective, but it smells good. Yamapi flops onto the couch and Jin sinks down next to him, playing with his phone and Yamapi watches him. He’s texting, or tweeting, or scrolling through his ninja Facebook, and Yamapi wonders how he keeps up with it all.

Jin notices him staring and makes a stupid face. “What?”

“Nothing better to look at,” Yamapi replies, kicking him in the shin, and Jin blindly sends a punch back at him. “I haven’t seen you in like two months, asshole. Tell me what you’ve been up to.”

The screen goes black and so does Jin, the tiny burning cherry from the incense not enough to light even a shadow. Yamapi hears a sigh and fully prepares to kick Jin again, but then his soft voice fills the air.

“I already told you all of this. The collaboration single is dropping next week. All the preparations are made.”

“Not business,” Yamapi clarifies. “Tell me what _you_ have been up to.”

“It’s all business,” Jin insists. “I hang out with Dom and the girls sometimes, but nothing to really write home about.”

“Really?” Yamapi asks, but he’s not convinced. “I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”

That last part just kind of slipped out, and Yamapi blames the dark. It’s easier to be honest when no one can see you. He thinks about retracting it, but it’s the truth. He’s never lied to Jin, or kept secrets from him, and he’s not about to start now.

“Idiot,” Jin scoffs back. “I’m still the same guy you’ve always known. I’m just farther away now.”

“Maybe that’s it,” Yamapi mumbles. “Too far.”

He expects Jin to mock him, or at least laugh, but all he does is reach out until his hand makes contact with Yamapi’s shoulder. It’s followed by his head, and it’s such a natural instinct that Yamapi has his arm around him before it occurs to him exactly what he’s doing.

“I’m not far now,” Jin says, his voice low and airy. “And it’s really cold.”

It _is_ really cold. Yamapi has blankets stashed all over his apartment, but that requires moving and he can’t see an inch in front of him. There’s an afghan on the back of the couch that Rina had stitched for him, which will serve the purpose for now. Jin scoots closer as they huddle under the afghan, and Yamapi can feel Jin’s heartbeat as well as his breath through the thin material of his shirt.

“I miss you, too,” Jin whispers, and something inside Yamapi aches. “I’ve been keeping busy to distract myself from how lonely I am. I love California and the music and everyone… but I get really homesick sometimes.”

“I know what you mean,” Yamapi replies, thinking about Korea and China and every day since Jin officially moved to L.A.

Jin’s laughter rumbles Yamapi’s chest, and it’s warmer than a whole pile of blankets could ever be. “How would you know?” he challenges. “Nothing has changed for you. You still have your family and your group and your – our – friends.”

“They’re not you,” Yamapi says, and Jin falls silent.

They sit like that for a long while, the sounds of the pouring rain a pleasant backdrop for Yamapi’s feelings that he doesn’t understand. His mind isn’t quite racing, but he feels like it should be, especially when Jin flings his arm across Yamapi’s torso and hugs him properly.

“Cold,” is all Jin mutters. An excuse.

There’s a twinge of pain as Yamapi hugs him back, pressing his face into Jin’s hair that smells like Skittles, and it doesn’t make any sense. He doesn’t understand how his heart could be breaking right now. He loves Jin, he always has. Like a best friend, like a brother, like a soul mate. It could just be him and Jin for the rest of his life and he’d be happy. This isn’t the first time they’ve been this close, physically, although the occasions have been few and far between as they’ve gotten older.

Yamapi holds back the rush of emotions threatening to overpower him as he _gets_ it, tightening his arms around Jin and saying with his embrace what he can’t say with words, because next week Jin’s going to debut in America and who knows when he’ll have a chance to come home again. When Yamapi will see him again.

“Pi,” he hears, in that small voice he hasn’t heard since they were kids. “What are you thinking about?”

“Food,” Yamapi answers instantly, dropping one of his hands to pat his belly for effect.

Jin grabs it and puts it right back where it was. “Liar.”

It’s pitch black dark, but somehow Yamapi can see Jin. He’d lifted his head, the weight gone from his shoulder, and now Jin’s _staring_ at him, his even breathing barely audible, and now Yamapi really wants the lights to come back on. Just to see Jin’s expression and what his eyes can’t hide. To see if maybe, just maybe, Yamapi isn’t alone in his thoughts, his feelings, his…

“You,” he says, followed by a rush of air in an exhale of relief. “I’m thinking about you.”

Jin’s hand finds his face, gently turning his head towards him and down, leaning their foreheads together. Their noses bump and Jin laughs, a short chuckle that seems to lighten the atmosphere. Yamapi rubs their noses together and Jin does it back, then his hand slides up Yamapi’s jaw in the most intimate touch he’s ever received from the other man.

“I’m always thinking about you,” Jin whispers, his last syllable spoken into Yamapi’s lips as he presses them together.

It takes Yamapi a second to realize he’s being kissed, by _Jin_ , but it’s long enough for Jin to pull away completely, scooting to the next couch cushion and abandoning all physical contact. Yamapi hadn’t realized how warm Jin was making him until it’s gone, and he can almost _see_ Jin silently freaking out, imagines him with his head in his hands while the worst flies through his mind.

“Jin,” Yamapi says, his lips tingling, and a muffled noise of acknowledgement answers him. He doesn’t know what else to say, doesn’t really want to say anything, just continue from where they’d left off and he’s already stretching out his arm before his brain catches up with him. It makes contact with Jin’s bicep and that’s enough; Yamapi _pulls_ with all of his strength and somehow Jin returns right where he was, mouths sliding together like they’d been magnetically attracted and Jin ends up partly in Yamapi’s lap, one leg bent between Yamapi’s knees.

Jin’s kiss is strong, hot and desperate and Yamapi has to fight to keep up. It’s nothing like kissing a girl, the hairs on Jin’s upper lip tickling his clean-shaven skin and Jin’s broad shoulders under his hands, and Yamapi likes it. Jin’s cologne is spicy and masculine and Yamapi gets lost in it, his fists clenching in Jin’s shirt as he feels all of his misplaced emotions and confusion sort themselves out in his kiss, and suddenly everything is clear.

Then the lights flicker, and Yamapi catches a flash of panic in Jin’s eyes during the fraction of a second he can see. “Jin,” he says again. “Why are you so scared?”

“I’ve done a lot of terrifying things in my life,” Jin says, his voice very deep and quiet. “Five years ago, I went to L.A. hardly knowing any English. Two years ago, I did a live singing by myself for the first time. Last year, I put together my own solo concert with English songs I wrote. This year I filmed a movie in London without any backing from Johnny. Next week, I’m going to _debut_ in America and it feels a bit like jumping out of a plane.”

“Jin, you’re going to be amazing-” Yamapi starts.

“But none of it is nearly as terrifying as doing this with you,” Jin goes on, and now he’s shaking. “You’re my best friend and I love you, but I cannot stand to lose you. It will kill me.”

“You’re not going to lose me,” Yamapi says, his arms looping around Jin’s waist to hold him close. “I love you, too.”

“Tomo,” Jin whispers into Yamapi’s shirt, clinging to his shoulders, and Yamapi’s heart soars. “I’m a shitty boyfriend. I flirt with everyone and I forget important dates and I drink too much and sometimes I just want to be alone-”

“I know all of that, idiot,” Yamapi cuts him off. “And you forgot that little detail about you living five thousand miles away.”

“See?” Jin exclaims. “All valid reasons why we should just stop right now and pretend nothing ever happened.”

“It’s too late for that,” Yamapi says firmly. He knows he’s being stubborn and he doesn’t care; he’s had a taste of Jin and doesn’t want to stop now or ever. “Up until the lights went out, I’d never even thought about kissing another guy like that. Now I don’t want to kiss anyone else.”

“It’s not gay in the dark,” Jin says, seriously, and Yamapi rolls his eyes.

“Shut up and come here,” Yamapi orders, and Jin returns to his mouth like he’d never left. All at once it feels like he’s been kissing Jin forever, or maybe he’s just wanted to kiss him forever and didn’t know that’s what this kind of yearning meant.

“I’ve thought about it a lot,” Jin whispers between kisses as he straddles Yamapi’s lap properly and comes at him from straight on. “I’ve thought about doing a _lot_ of things with you.”

Sirens go off in Yamapi’s head, but they’re the good kind that has his touch turning more sensual as he runs his hands up and down Jin’s back. “Like what?”

Jin’s chuckle is deep and sultry, and Yamapi’s mind flashes with every sexy dance, pose, face, and voice Jin has given his fans over the years. This is what he _does_ ; this is who he _is_ , and as long as those lights stay out, Yamapi’s going to experience this _other_ side of his best friend.

Now Yamapi never wants the power to come back on.

“Like this,” Jin says, pressing even closer to him and rolling his hips. Yamapi feels it, hard between his legs, and instantly he swells to match. “I’ve always wondered what you’re like in bed, Tomohisa.”

“We’re not in bed,” Yamapi points out. “We’re on the couch.”

“Smart ass,” Jin scoffs, and Yamapi grabs him by the ass and rocks up against him.

The noise Jin makes is beautiful, seeming to echo in the otherwise silent house, and Yamapi wants to make him do it again. He grinds Jin down against him and Jin takes it from there, gasping into his mouth as denim rubs against denim.

“Tomo,” Jin gets out, his voice rushed and heavy with breath. “I want to… touch it…”

“Please,” Yamapi says, and he groans low in his throat as Jin’s hands fly to his belt. “Have you done this before?”

“A bit,” Jin replies, sounding sheepish. “I wish I’d done it with you first.”

“You should have,” Yamapi huffs. “I’d have let you back then just like I am now.”

Jin has his pants open now, his knuckle bumping against the head of Yamapi’s impossibly hard cock and Yamapi growls, diving back into Jin’s mouth and kissing him fiercely. Jin’s fingers rub him through his boxers and something snaps inside Yamapi – he picks Jin up by the ass and throws him down on the couch, crawling on top of him and pushing right into his hand.

“Fuck, you’re hot,” Jin breathes against Yamapi’s lips, his legs falling open as he reaches for his own belt. “Give me your hand.”

Obediently Yamapi follows orders and Jin laces their fingers together, pushing down until they bump something smooth and hard and Jin’s moan tickles Yamapi’s tongue. Yamapi takes Jin in his hand, feeling the weight and throbbing that’s just for him, and he strokes it just like he’d do to himself. Jin arches beneath him, pushing up into his hand and making those gorgeous noises, which Yamapi offsets with his deep groans from Jin’s twisting grip on his own cock.

“Did you think about this,” Yamapi asks, shuddering at the way Jin thumbs the head. “With me.”

“Yeah,” Jin replies, his breath coming in gasps, and Yamapi feels a drop of precome on his skin. “Only I thought of it like _this_.”

He brushes his knuckles against Yamapi’s, urging him out of the way, and then they’re both in Jin’s hand. Yamapi can feel Jin’s pulse against his and it’s surreal, enticing and Yamapi makes it until Jin rubs the tips together before tearing his mouth away. He kisses his way down Jin’s jaw to his neck, where he pants and nips while his body shudders on top of Jin.

“God, Jin,” he groans, adding his hand alongside Jin’s, and there’s something intimate about their fingers intertwining like this. “I’m gonna come like this.”

“Wait for me, I’m almost there,” Jin says, his voice strained, and he rushes to push up his shirt with his free hand before snapping his hips uncontrollably. “Fuck, Tomo, _now_.”

Yamapi can _feel_ Jin come and it’s the strangest sensation, one that stays with him as he reaches his own peak, both of them spilling over their hands and onto Jin’s stomach. Jin’s nose pokes his cheek and Yamapi manages to lift his head, feels Jin’s lips against his and kisses him through the waves of his orgasm.

When Yamapi opens his eyes, he can see Jin perfectly, and the only thing that stops him from jumping in shock is the doting look in Jin’s eyes. Yamapi sees it, everything Jin claimed to feel shining back at him, and he narrows his eyes in suspicion.

“Did you make the power go out?” he accuses.

Jin laughs, his cheeks tinted pink. “I’m not _that_ awesome.”

“Jin,” he starts, then gets distracted by the substance on his hand, which Jin helpfully pulls to his mouth and licks clean. “I… um… forgot what I was going to say.”

Jin’s eyes turn wicked as he finishes Yamapi’s hand and starts in on his own. Yamapi watches him, mesmerized, as Jin licks his lips and stares hard at Yamapi. “Kiss me.”

Instantly Yamapi complies and he tastes it, both of them, and it makes him want more. He kisses Jin until Jin laughs and Yamapi pulls back in frustration, pouting, and Jin pushes his bottom lip back in with a finger.

“What are we doing, Pi?” Jin asks, still a bit breathless, and Yamapi has never been so attracted to another person before.

“The lights are on, Jin,” Yamapi tells him. “Is it still gay?”

Jin laughs again. “It was gay before, dumbass.”

“Don’t call me a dumbass, fatass,” Yamapi chides, poking Jin in the flesh of his belly.

They wrestle for a bit, until Jin leans up and kisses him, and they both pause. “I really, really want to be with you,” Jin whispers against his lips. “In the light _and_ the dark.”

“Okay,” Yamapi agrees, and they close their eyes to the light once more.


End file.
